Well, Shit.

Do you ever have one of those days where a terrible incident happens, and there had been a tiny clue beforehand that could have helped you avert the crisis if only you had been perceptive enough to realize it?

Today started out like any other day. Nathan and I got up at 7:30am, and he had a poopy diaper in the morning (the kid is a regular morning pooper - a detail that is important to remember later). We played on the floor, I fed him some meals, he napped, we visited my grandparents, etc etc. It was a pretty normal day. At 6:00pm, I decided to give him a bath. Usually, I bathe him in the afternoon but today we were busy all afternoon so I pushed his bath to the evening. Just a small tweak to his daily routine.

I filled up his little bathtub which hovered over the kitchen sink. Yes, we were still using that handy little tub that has gone through four cousins now. Nathan is a back archer, and I never know when he'll suddenly forcefully throw himself down on his back. For that reason, I can't just sit him up in the regular bathtub just yet. I tried using a mesh bath sling but boy did he hate it. I also can't get into the bathtub with him because I can't fathom how to get out of a slippery bathtub alone with a wet squirmy baby. Anyway, I digress. Our story leads us to Nathan's room where I'm about to take off his outfit and diaper.

Nathan let out a little fart. "Oh ho, you tooted, Nathan!" I chortled.

"Hmm....is there poop?" (Sidenote: when you are alone with your baby all day, you tend to vocalize all your thoughts to him). I quickly checked his diaper, but there was nothing.

"Nah, false alarm. Anyway, you're a morning pooper, aren't you bud?" I said cheerfully. In hindsight, this was my clue.

I stripped him down and plopped him in his baby bathtub. We played with the water and soap, I scrubbed him up and down. We sang bath songs, and I tickled his feet. I was about to flip him over onto his belly when I saw something between his legs. Something yellow-orangey.

SHIT!

I shrieked and scared Nathan half to death. I went into auto-pilot. First I lifted my shitty baby up in the air and ran back to his changetable. I wiped any poop I could find. I went to the bathroom sink and quickly re-washed him. I got him back onto the changetable where, to add insult to disgusting injury, he peed all over. ARGH! I diapered and dressed him. Now I had a plastic tub full of water and shit in my kitchen, and a baby who was bordering on tears from the sudden franticness of the situation. I plopped Nathan into his jumperoo and decided to empty out the tub o' shit into the toilet. Now this next part is gag-worthy. I think only a parent would know the special kind of consistency shit becomes when one's diet consists of baby formula, purees and finger food. It's a smelly semi-solid horror show when it's contained in a goddamned diaper, never mind in a tub full of lukewarm water.

Baby screaming in the background, I dumped the contents of the tub down the toilet. But of course it didn't all land in the toilet bowl. Of course it went spilling all around the toilet rim onto the floor due to the crappy design of the tub (pun fully intended). Once emptied, I looked at the baby tub and decided to throw it away. No amount of bleach or disinfectant would ever convince me to use it again. Since it was borrowed, I would buy a replacement tub tomorrow. Baby still wailing, I cleaned up and disinfected everything I could think of.

An hour later when Jay came home from hockey, he asked me how my day went. I gave him the Cole's Notes version, and he said brightly "Well, at least you can blog about it."

Sigh. And to think this morning when I woke up, I had no idea the things I would end up doing. Oh, the joys of parenthood...

I think I'll have a glass (or bottle) of wine tonight.

A very little bit of solace comes from the fact that I know I'm not the first parent to experience this. But oh God, this had better be the only time.

In happier times

Letters to Nathan: Nine Months

Dear Nathan,

Happy nine months, dear boy! When I think of nine months, I automatically think of how long I was pregnant. I can't believe that you've now been out in this world for as long as you were in my tummy. It feels like a bit of a paradox because while nine months feels like a really long time, it has also flown right by. You're now such a curious happy boy. You're so squirmy these days, you're really trying to get to places and while you may have the motivation, you lack the means of getting there. So you're in a constant state of yearning. I can't wait for you to learn to crawl because I think you'll be so much happier to get where you want to go, instead of me trying to guess and lead you. You've got such an infectious laugh....we laugh and giggle together all day, being silly.

Stranger anxiety has continued this month. We went on a playdate with other babies born last June, and you were a bit apprehensive about the whole thing. You like your routines, and when we stayed at the playdate for a few hours and it got past your naptime, you definitely let me know that you were at your limit.

You got sick for the first time, and it was awful. I wrote a bit about it here, but basically I hope that you never ever get sick again. You looked like a zombie for about two weeks, but then you bounced right back.

You learned how to use a straw sippy cup. We were having no luck at all with a regular sippy cup - you couldn't figure out that you had to tip the cup up to get the water out, but you quickly caught onto using a straw.

You really like feeding yourself, and you often get angry when you see me with a spoonful of food coming towards your mouth. You're obsessed with Mum-Mum rice crackers and small puff cereal. You've been working on your pincer grip by picking up the puffs and putting them in your mouth. At first, you could only grab it in your fist and jam your fist into your mouth, not quite grasping how to release the puff but after a week or so of practising, you've got the hang of it.

Sometimes you're such a serious little boy. When you've got your hands on something sensory that you love, you get this look of great concentration. Your favourite toy is a piece of velcro on the back of a plush mirror. You also love zippers, measuring cups, wobbling footballs, and anything that dangles.

You're getting a top tooth. It hasn't quite broken through your gums yet but I can see the white bump. In the meantime, you love grinning to show off your two bottom teeth.

You discovered your love for jumping this month and have been making good use of your jumperoo.


This past weekend, I was a bridesmaid at my cousin Vicky's wedding so I was gone the whole day. I was a bit nervous because I've never been away from you for more than a few hours, and this meant that you and your dad would be on your own for the day until you joined us at the reception in the evening. You breezed through the day and had a great time at the wedding, delighting everyone around you. You've come so far in terms of your independence from six months ago when Vicky asked me to be in her wedding party. I'm disappointed that the day was too busy to get many photos, but rest assured that you looked handsome and dapper in your formal outfit.

Hanging out with Daddy during the day

Me with the beautiful bride

Sharing a sweet quiet moment together on a hectic day

You had a big growth spurt this month, getting two inches taller! You're so big now at 21 pounds and 74cm tall. I look back at photos of you when you were just born and I can't believe you're the same baby. It's getting quite hard to take your monthly photo these days because you move around so much. It took about fifty photos to get a few still ones, you squirmy monkey.

Love always,
Mumma

A Fresh Start

Maybe it's because spring is in the air (well, if you ignore the snowy ground) but I felt the need for a fresh change. So voila! New name, new look.

The old blog title, "The Adventures of Jay and Michelle", didn't really reflect our little family anymore. I hope to post a little more this year about other things happening in our lives, not just chronicling the adventures of our wee Nathan, as fun as it is to write and read those posts. I like to think that I put a pinch of love in most things that I do, and I hope you all like the new blog as much as I do.